Detach Emotions
Most people recommend detachment from the addict. People don’t believe addiction is a disease, they see it as moral depravity. People believe that the addict is responsible for his own destruction and that he can get out of this disease by sheer force of will, no one needs to help him or if he dies, he will surely die. There is nothing we can do to help addicts recover. Dr. Sadaqat Ali is Project Director of Turning Point. He is a prominent drug expert of the country. His name is the most prominent in the treatment of addiction in Pakistan. After completing his MBBS from Dow Medical College, Karachi, he pursued higher education in addiction treatment from Hazelden, Minnesota, USA. So far, thousands of drug addicts have been cured by him. At first there was much clamor for the provision of artificial respiration.
The question arose: Does the effort to bring man back from the hands of God beautify us? If someone dies by drowning, will it be an interference in God’s work to make his heart flutter? There is no bill for making things, so people make it unaccountable, but if someone who drowns in the river is their own, people jump into the river even if they can’t swim! A stranger’s life does not seem so precious! The same goes for counseling an addict about detachment. It’s easy to give advice to others, but what if someone is addicted to heroin and cocaine? What if a drunkard has a crown on his head? In such a case, the lesson of detachment is not remembered. You are repeatedly advised to be detached, however, you are unable to do so.
Returning again and again, the idea of ​​detachment does not make a place in your heart for long. Experts never advise families to separate, instead they use the term “physical distance” or “emotional distance.” When the patient attacks you emotionally and physically, you must defend yourself as best you can. You don’t counterattack, but you protect yourself as much as possible and don’t regret defending. You do not take pride in being beaten or abused and do not make yourself a martyr. Physical distance is needed when the patient comes to injure you. We will talk about physical distance again. Most experts talk about emotional distance. There is a big difference between detachment and emotional detachment.
By using the words “detachment” the concept of emotional distance is made very difficult to understand. A highly effective directive has become meaningless because it does not meet the emotional demands of our nature, it seems the opposite of rescue efforts. This gives the impression of standing aloof and watching the spectacle in silence. Actually one needs to understand the difference between detachment and emotional distance from a loved one. When experts recommend emotional distancing, they want you to avoid becoming emotionally entangled with the addict, but that doesn’t necessarily mean treating them harshly or recklessly. It also doesn’t mean leaving it to drown in the middle of nowhere.
Most families are reluctant to accept the advice of emotional distancing. Due to a certain misunderstanding, the family system is seen as opposed to emotional distancing. It’s true that it’s the addict’s problem, not yours, since he’s your son, it’s your problem too. Emotional distance does not mean that you end the relationship with him, it just means that instead of becoming a partner of his mood and mood, stay calm but think of an effective solution to the problem, because it is both his and yours. Yes, in his rescue there is your rescue. However, it is not necessary for you to be upset if you are upset. If he is happy, you are happy. You control your moods and moods throughout your life and daily routines you can keep it in perspective, but you can also help him a lot by staying emotionally distant. Now that emotional storms in the brain can be imaged, we know much that was not possible before.
When a situation appears dangerous to the outside world, the alarm bells immediately start ringing so that we prepare to fight or avoid it. The heart starts pounding, breathing quickens, face contorts, blood pressure rises and adrenaline rushes through the veins. The funny thing is that our consciousness does not even recognize the danger properly and the parrots fly away from our hands. All this happens before our conscious thought. Have learned many things which were not possible before. When a situation appears dangerous to the outside world, the alarm bells immediately start ringing so that we prepare to fight or avoid it. The heart starts pounding, breathing quickens, face contorts, blood pressure rises and adrenaline rushes through the veins. The funny thing is that our consciousness does not even recognize the danger properly and the parrots fly away from our hands.
All this happens before our conscious thought. Have learned many things which were not possible before. When a situation appears dangerous to the outside world, the alarm bells immediately start ringing so that we prepare to fight or avoid it. The heart starts pounding, breathing quickens, face contorts, blood pressure rises and adrenaline rushes through the veins. The funny thing is that our consciousness does not even recognize the danger properly and the parrots fly away from our hands. All this happens before our conscious thought. It is not even recognizable and the parrots fly away from our hands. All this happens before our conscious thought. It is not even recognizable and the parrots fly away from our hands. All this happens before our conscious thought.
This declaration of war is not a deliberate decision of our mind. Isn’t it strange? A small almond-like part of the brain, the amygdala, senses danger from the surroundings and declares an emergency, and panic spreads throughout the body. Consider that the key to survival actually resides in the amygdala. This storm in a teacup is not a thought-out reaction, the amygdala does not wait for advice from the conscious mind, and the senses shout “go away” on the basis of raw information received from the khumsa. The amygdala activates very quickly and starts running and drooling as a memory. Scientists have said in the light of experiments that when we see an angry face, our amygdala starts to go out of control in twenty-fifth of a second.
It is not possible to think in a very short time, it is all done by thinking. In such a short time, the amygdala arranges that around if there is any possible danger, then only such thirty of it. The amygdala then sends a signal to a gland located above the kidney to prepare for war, to invade! In other words, the amygdala acts on its own accord and does not wait for orders from a “big or small” and declares war. The amygdala works intuitively, but conscious thought is not part of its role. The amygdala has learned the lesson that immediate action does not require permission. The amygdala rushes to our rescue while our conscious mind uses reason and judgment and issues orders after a detailed assessment of the situation. The amygdala is not convinced to wait, the amygdala is not prepared to wait in a dangerous situation, and this is its duty.
Whenever he smells danger or sees something alarming, he springs into action. You could also call it a “hot button.” When someone comes home drunk and is in a bitter mood, your amygdala goes off the alarm and you immediately grab a diaper to fight instead of caution. As soon as you see it, the negotiation turns into a riot, and then you regret your attitude, and in such a case, you call it the same. They give something that they were forbidding before. Provocation and then support are indispensable. You actually need to intervene in the addict’s life and to negotiate with an addict requires a lot of knowledge and learning, a lot of preparation and skill. Besides, in the heat of the moment, things can only get worse. With long planning, consistent leadership and a cool heart and mind, the situation can be improved.
The comforting thing is that we are not only at the mercy of the amygdala, right in front of our brain behind the forehead is the seat of consciousness, and you might call it the mastermind. This part of the brain operates on “ideas” such as “lift, then speak” and “blow and take action”, but the amygdala rants before the mass mind’s polite and concrete steps are taken. It takes time for the mass mind to formulate a final policy and our prosperity depends on how quickly this final policy replaces the stampede. The amygdala’s responsibility is limited to immediate rescue, for example if we are walking somewhere and the amygdala thinks there is a snake in our way, it will immediately prompt us to stop, run away, or die. Our gross mind will soon realize that it is not a snake but just a rope, so it will allow us to smile and move on. The amygdala prepares for temporary actions without wasting time.
The amygdala is also very much a “thing”. If we had to rely only on our mass mind, we might make the mistake of pondering many snakes and scorpions as we go through life, counting the hours of waiting, deciding to choose one of the available options and so on. Meanwhile, snakes and scorpions would get a chance to bite and we would lose our lives. When Blanoosh enters the garage with the car, while the amygdala immediately prepares us to fight, the mastermind wants to examine his mannerisms and mannerisms. Is he really drinking or not? What stage of smoking is he in? Has he just gotten drunk and drunk? Or has it been a few hours since he drank the wine and is now in a bitter phase from the toxic effects of the alcohol, or is he drunk and walking away from her and unable to speak?
To make this decision, the mastermind wants to see him walk past him and enter the house. Does his mouth smell of alcohol? What does his mood look like? What precautions should we take? It is very common for children to become distraught as soon as they enter the house. They hide in their room or leave the house to meet friends. The final decisions of that mastermind don’t wait to see if it’s in or not? They listen to the amygdala that says, “Get up, run, and run.” They scurry to a safe haven to avoid an attack. As a result, the addict feels shame. He thinks that even if he is not drunk, people run away from him. In such a situation, he orders everyone to stay “on the line” through threats of bullying in the face of helplessness. This alarm of danger is also triggered when there are negative consequences of addiction.
For example, when a drug addict is fired from a job, the family becomes anxious and reacts quickly, removing him with worry even though he needs to be worried. Even when Blanosh sits on the driving seat, the anxiety of the family starts to touch the sky. Result: Wherever they are going, their destination becomes a conflict. When he steals money from his mother’s purse and smokes heroin, fear and dread are at their peak. How much more do we think it will fall? When a mother leaves the children alone and throws Xenox pills, the children are scared. What can they do immediately? A fight or a graveyard silence. What will the massed mind say if it comes to the field? ”Yes! This is a very serious situation and it would be good if we take appropriate action immediately otherwise our life will also go backward.
In fact, by taking action, we will save not only him but also ourselves. The amygdala says to do something. The mass mind says take the best action that leads to positive results. What would be the best course of action in such a case? Contact an expert? Advice? Or currently typing your problem into Google to get basic information? Or chat behind the scenes with an expert on our website? Most of the amygdala has been active since time immemorial because at that time humans were dealing with problems for which thinking was not necessary but running was more effective. With the passage of time, the role of thinking also came to the fore. Today, most of the problems can be solved only through thinking and discussion. Another theory is that there is a load-shedding relationship between the two for circulation.
If the amygdala is activated, it will draw more blood towards it, so the mastermind will have less blood and will not be able to do higher level thinking. Both cannot take sufficient amount of blood at the same time, so both cannot perform well together. To coordinate between these two, you have to make their on-off switches that remain in your hand, the camels become masterless. This is a learning task. Close relatives and friends of Balanush are very anxious. Research shows that the amygdala becomes “activated” when we experience repeated stress and trauma. Communication between different parts of the brain decreases and friction increases. Cells become hyperactive and a tumor forms. This is the reason why a Blanosh’s wife jumps every time the phone rings. Even if there is a knock on the door, the kidney comes to the mouth.
The amygdala becomes even more sensitive and can smell danger even where there is no danger at all, so it tries to solve Blanoosh’s problems so that the narrator can write China and get it. Emotional distance is a spiritual step. This stabilizes the mind and illusions and weak beliefs do not arise. Emotional distancing is actually a name for positive thinking based on patience and tolerance, but in the meantime, practical actions continue. The family never forgets the patient and his illness. They continue their knowledge, skills and training but stay away from pointless intrusions and loose ends. Emotional distance paves the way for productive action. It is a combination of staying calm and taking concrete action. Emotional distance provides opportunities not only to protect your self-esteem, but also to truly help your loved one.
By reorganizing our emotions, we can reduce the intensity of others’ suffering. Many components work together to create a plan and get something done. Emotional distance also frees us from assumptions and paralyzing fears. We use our natural instincts constructively to help our loved ones it opens promising avenues. Emotional distance doesn’t mean building a wall between you and your loved one, but rather building a golden bridge so that they can turn to us for help and we can turn to them, but if you get tired, there’s nothing wrong with staying on your side for a while. When a loved one is bent on ruining their life, true friends always step in to make amends. This is what people have been doing for thousands of years, even though modern methods of interfering in other people’s lives were not yet discovered. Sometimes they were quite forceful.
In such a situation, when they did not get success despite their efforts, they used to sit down exhausted. Then some other people would come forward to help, often the addicts refuse to accept help. It is difficult to help a person who does not want help. Self-help is not easy when it comes to addictions. The truth is, even if one is willing to accept help, it is not easy to help, but if scientific methods are used together, success becomes relatively easy. Today there are sophisticated ways of interfering in the lives of others, it is a blessing to sit on your hands in their presence. Most people they think that meddling in someone’s life can become a matter of virtue and sinfulness, yet helping is considered good. Helping a loved one is a very patient task, a sacred adventure that is another name for a beautiful life of love. Drugs, alcohol and other addictions destroy the peace and tranquility of homes.
People suffering from addictions do not take the first step towards reformation themselves, it is carried by those who love them. The treatment decision emerges from the healthy minds around the patient. Drug abuse makes you sick and helpless. This disease is devastating. However, rest assured it is treatable. There are many ways to recover from drug, alcohol and other addictions. Not everyone needs admission. If the addiction is starting, the patient does not need to come to the treatment. Families can help their loved one get rid of the addiction through training. If the disease is very old, admission is necessary. It is our responsibility to explain to you how to create desire and passion for treatment in the patient. Willing is the unique treatment center of Vision eduction, where clients unleash their creativity and rebuild their lives. The miracle you waited for is now waiting for you.